Each person has their own preference. Techniques and positions for practicing masturbation are not uncommon! On the contrary, it is not exceptional that the same way of doing things is repeated and repeated, touch after touch. Yet pleasure is indifferent to age, gender, sexual orientation, any other factor that can define a person, and it grows with use. So why this reluctance to explore the world of solitary pleasure?
Education and influences
While the positive effects on physical and mental health of masturbation are no longer to be proven, it is not uncommon for its practice to be reduced (or even absent) for various reasons. Masturbation, although less and less taboo, still takes on this very private character and many hesitate to speak about it. However, being informed not only allows you to understand, but also to find ways to diversify the pleasure.
A particular education, multiple sources of influence and many other causes invite feelings of guilt, shame or embarrassment in bed, which prompts many to practice abstinence from masturbatory. It takes a lot of effort to let go of deep-rooted beliefs.
One reader, who wishes to remain anonymous, says: “I am 45 years old and I still feel so guilty about masturbating. I can’t do it. Too often I lose my erection or if I have it, I come on too fast. Finally, nothing pleasant. My mother was very strict, I grew up alone with her. For her, sex is dirty. She traumatized me when she ran into my room one morning when I was just 14 and stroking myself. She called me every name, including obsessive pervert … I got some things in therapy, but the hurt remains. Maybe someday I’ll be free from this guilt for pleasure, anyway, I’m working hard to get rid of it! “
A few tips
First, it might be interesting, before undertaking any technique whatsoever, to ask yourself these few questions:
- How is my health (physical, emotional, relational)?
- Am I hypersensitive?
- In what environment (or atmosphere) do I feel good, relaxed?
- What look do I have on my body, on sexuality?
- Do I consider that I have enough privacy?
Once you get the answers, it will be easier for you to orient the type of exploration you want to do.
With bare hands: direct contact on the skin, on the genitals …
Sitting, standing, lying: on an armchair a rolled up towel, clean, between the legs. In the shower using the shower head. Stretched out on your back, legs in scissors or in a diamond position (knees apart and resting on the side while feet touch each other) …
Overlay: fabrics, fabrics which are interposed between the organ and the hand, indirect contact (sandwich technique) …
In a relationship with : looking at each other, using the feet (or any part of the body) to stimulate the other …
With sex objects: one or two sources of stimulation (beware of the temptation to use an object that is not designed for sexual stimulation – certain dangers may lie in wait for the user). Lubricants, massage creams …
And you, what are your favorite preferences and positions to enjoy this pleasure solo?
To explore further, don’t hesitate to browse the sexual health section of your favorite bookstore!